In my mind, I am a hero. Role-playing allows me to channel that inner hero.
While TV and movies allow me to look into the lives of heroes and video games give me the opportunity to act like a hero, only role-playing games give me the freedom to be a hero for a time. Unlike video games, this is not someone else's story, someone else's character (even if given choices) that I have to follow. I create the background of my character, build how he looks, decide how he would react in situations, and choose whom he will fight and whom he will befriend. I can even choose how lethal my character will choose to be (though it seems the default for most people is to kill everything).
I also love the game for its (literally) fantastic settings. As good as CG effects have become, movie images still cannot compare to the scenes my imagination creates. In role-playing, I am transported to another time or world (or both) and get to "see" things that other people often can't imagine. This is true for the characters and creatures that I encounter as well. In role-playing, I can haggle with a dwarf, philosophize with a dragon, ride a pegasus, fight a manticore, and pull pranks with a pixie. These extremes that are beyond what humans can experience allow me to explore my own humanity and decide what being human even means (even when playing as an elf).
My frustrations are that I game so infrequently that I start to expect so much from each session. Gone are the days when I could meet with friends once a week (or more) and even pull all-day gaming sessions. This makes it so sessions that end unresolved or that do not allow my character to do what I want him to do (the invisible wall problem) end up frustrating me more than they did in the past.
Also, too often I end up running the campaign rather than playing in one. Running a good game requires a great deal of time and preparation. Usually, I do not have the time or energy to make the game up to my standards, and even if I do I'm usually too lazy to put the effort needed into it. My real issue with DMing, however, is that I don't get to be the hero. While I can have heroic NPCs, they can only be side-line characters. Most of the time, I'm playing the villains of the story.
Lastly, while I enjoy playing the Dungeons and Dragons system (3.5 more so than other games), it is still a limited system. It rewards killing enemies over diplomacy and exploration. I have begun crafting my own system so that my character's actions follow a more believable (though still fantastic) trend, but it is difficult, and I have found many stumbling blocks. Overall, I wonder if the project is worth my time when so few people (perhaps none) would benefit from it. For now (until Wizards of the Coast makes another pass at a new system later this year), I think I need to be happy with what I have (especially considering the investment in books and figures). I think I would be if I got to game more often.
While TV and movies allow me to look into the lives of heroes and video games give me the opportunity to act like a hero, only role-playing games give me the freedom to be a hero for a time. Unlike video games, this is not someone else's story, someone else's character (even if given choices) that I have to follow. I create the background of my character, build how he looks, decide how he would react in situations, and choose whom he will fight and whom he will befriend. I can even choose how lethal my character will choose to be (though it seems the default for most people is to kill everything).
I also love the game for its (literally) fantastic settings. As good as CG effects have become, movie images still cannot compare to the scenes my imagination creates. In role-playing, I am transported to another time or world (or both) and get to "see" things that other people often can't imagine. This is true for the characters and creatures that I encounter as well. In role-playing, I can haggle with a dwarf, philosophize with a dragon, ride a pegasus, fight a manticore, and pull pranks with a pixie. These extremes that are beyond what humans can experience allow me to explore my own humanity and decide what being human even means (even when playing as an elf).
My frustrations are that I game so infrequently that I start to expect so much from each session. Gone are the days when I could meet with friends once a week (or more) and even pull all-day gaming sessions. This makes it so sessions that end unresolved or that do not allow my character to do what I want him to do (the invisible wall problem) end up frustrating me more than they did in the past.
Also, too often I end up running the campaign rather than playing in one. Running a good game requires a great deal of time and preparation. Usually, I do not have the time or energy to make the game up to my standards, and even if I do I'm usually too lazy to put the effort needed into it. My real issue with DMing, however, is that I don't get to be the hero. While I can have heroic NPCs, they can only be side-line characters. Most of the time, I'm playing the villains of the story.
Lastly, while I enjoy playing the Dungeons and Dragons system (3.5 more so than other games), it is still a limited system. It rewards killing enemies over diplomacy and exploration. I have begun crafting my own system so that my character's actions follow a more believable (though still fantastic) trend, but it is difficult, and I have found many stumbling blocks. Overall, I wonder if the project is worth my time when so few people (perhaps none) would benefit from it. For now (until Wizards of the Coast makes another pass at a new system later this year), I think I need to be happy with what I have (especially considering the investment in books and figures). I think I would be if I got to game more often.
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