Blog Archives - The Land of the Weird

The Land of the Weird

Halloween 2017

10/31/2017

As I arrived home, I saw Connor making his finally adjustments to his jack o' lantern. He added a second eye, enlarged the mouth, had written the name "bob" on its forehead, and was putting in toothpicks for teeth (which we have since removed in case moose decide to trick-or-treat here later). By the time I had changed out of my exercise clothes (having participated in my first workout since I hurt my back nearly a month ago), the boys were ready to go. Before we left, I had the boys pose for a few pictures.

Like last year, we parked near a friend's house in town and then went trick-or-treating with several other families. We added a couple of roads to our route from last year, and I saw quite a few current and former students. In fact, so many people were greeting me or trying to get my attention that Janelle said it was like walking down the road with a celebrity.

The biggest change in our plans was that we visited the "Haunted Halls" of Soldotna Prep School. Surprisingly, Rowen wanted to go in with the other kids. However, by the time we got to the "mad scientist" room, he was not only gripping my hand tightly, but he started to dig in his heels, telling me that we couldn't keep going and that we had to go back. I really wish I had my phone out to get video of him, because he was so adorable in his fright. By the end, he was again insisting that he wasn't afraid; although he vigorously declined when I suggested that we go through again.

On the last leg of our journey, we could tell that Rowen was really dragging. He stopped going to houses for candy for himself for a little while, but then he started going again (this time without a bag), saying that he was "getting candy for mommy." Meanwhile, Connor was usually the first of our pack to get to any door, and held to that role until the very end. Trevor stayed back with the parents, having decided a few years ago that he is "too old" for trick-or-treating anymore.

We had a good time. The weather was quite cooperative, being warmer than the last couple of years and completely devoid of precipitation. There was, however, a light fog that added the perfect ambiance to the evening.

All in all, it was an enjoyable Halloween.

Hiccups

10/30/2017

Years ago, I learned a "trick" that made so a bout of hiccups would go away almost immediately after the first hiccup. It required mentally concentrating on my diaphragm to hold it steady while slowly expelling any air (or other substance, such as phlegm [really, two words in one sentence that end in "gm"?]) from my chest--a process that often makes me sound like I'm growling. This has left me largely hiccup free for many years.

Until today ...

No matter what I tried, I had a recurring hiccup plague my existence today. The longest bout lasted for a little over an hour and made it so, much to my students' entertainment, I had a high pitched squeak that would occasionally escape whenever I talked. Even more frustrating was the fact that the hiccups then attacked me at several more points during the day.

I don't know if my control of my diaphragm is less precise, or my "growl" is just less effective, but it led to a rather annoying day. The good news is that I have not had another bout for the past several hours. I just hope they stay away.

The Thirtieth Sunday in Ordinary Time

10/29/2017

God's laws and commandments can be summed up in one word: love. When asked to chose the greatest of commandments, Jesus gives us two: Love your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind AND Love your neighbor as yourself. This gives us three tasks: Love God (who is Love and is everywhere), love our neighbors, and (quite importantly) love ourselves.

In a world that seeks to divide us, Jesus tells us that we are to love and allow ourselves to be loved. Our world has polluted the word "love" by trying to dirty it, by attaching it mundane objects (e.g. I love my shampoo), and by the media trying to tell us that it should only be used for "the one" and no one else. Yet love is greater than any of the boxes that humans try to put around it. It is infinite in all dimensions.

"It surrounds us. It penetrates us. It binds the galaxy together." The Force that Obi Wan speaks of is love.

Ratchet and Clank: All for One

10/28/2017

After years of attempting to play through this Playstation 3 video game, the boys and I finally finished it today. The game's largest draw is that it allows you to play an action game with Ratchet and Clank characters with a group of friends. However, the fact that you needed a group of people working together to finish the game was also its primary difficulty. It's a longer game than I expected when I got it, and I have played it with a wide group of people. It was only this attempt, which I started with Trevor and Connor this summer, which actually had the stamina to get all the way through.

The game is worth playing. It encourages teamwork, with some puzzles requiring both planning and cooperation to be successfully completed. It is also full of Ratchet and Clank's signature humor. The comedy still does not reach the levels of this series' PS2 days, but it's the best from the PS3 era. Even the minor interactions between characters during the game play was continually amusing. Between the humor written into the game and the hijinks that come from a cooperative/competitive game, I continually found myself belly-laughing while playing it.

That does not mean that the game is without its faults. The control system is not the Ratchet and Clank controls that I know and love, and that often led to frustration when trying to get our characters to do what we wanted. The forced camera angle often made it hard to see the action, and that as well as some odd angles led to multiple unintentional deaths through the game. Sometimes the chaotic and frenetic action on screen led to completely losing track of our characters and dreading total party kills. Inevitably, that meant there was a lot of yelling between us as well.

Still, it was a fun game that the boys and I quite enjoyed.

Halloween Carnival

10/27/2017

Our church, Our Lady of Perpetual Help, hosts a yearly Halloween Carnival the weekend before Halloween. Children come dressed up in their costumes and there are rows of carnival activities for them to do. Hot dogs, pulled pork sandwiches, and popcorn are available with space to eat. The price is fifty cents per ticket, with most activities only costing one ticket.

Activities include face painting (I declined both working that area and getting my face painted), dart throwing, a leaf pile with buried treasure, basketball shooting, ring tossing, the boys' favorite--cake walk, and several others. All of them provide at least a minor reward just for participating. The boys went through 80 tickets in the course of about an hour, and had a great time doing so. All three of them managed to win at the cake walk, with Rowen winning on his very first attempt.

As for me, it turns out that I shouldn't just stand around while my boys are scattered through the various activities. For a little while, I was roped into manning the popcorn station (I still paid for the bags of popcorn I consumed). Later, I was asked to step into the Nerf gun booth as its operator mysteriously disappeared. Thankfully, not one of the many kids who came to the booth chose to shoot at me while I was there.

We enjoyed ourselves. For those in the area who missed going today, they are holding the carnival tomorrow as well. Just don't stand still too long.

Teacher/Parent Conferences

10/26/2017

After being on the parent side of the desk yesterday, it was my turn to sit on the teacher side today. As I have expressed before, I love parent/teacher conferences. They give me a chance to get everyone working on the same side, to clear up differences and misconceptions, and to learn more about my students and their families.

Today was no different. I was quite fortunate in that I met with nearly every parent of students who failed my first quarter as well as many parents of students who are doing quite well in my class. I am hoping that the positive tenor of our conversations today will resonate throughout the rest of the school year and allow my students to build on their successes in my class.

It was strange to be in the same conference area as Trevor's teachers were; although that did give me the opportunity to actually talk with his teachers this year. It also made it so I spent time with Janelle and the little boys as they visited conferences (Trevor was at rehearsal). Because of this, they also got to see me as "Mr. Marks" the teacher, a role they rarely (if ever) see me in.

It was a good day.

Parent/Teacher Conferences

10/25/2017

Today was our chance to talk with Connor and Rowen's teachers. Both of their teachers had plenty of nice things to say about the boys. The conferences went well. The boys are generally doing well in their classes and they are friendly and helpful at school.

It's nice to have these positive reports. So often, we see the boys fight and yell, throw temper tantrums and whine about chores, etc. I often worry that they carry that behavior beyond the house, especially when we sometimes see it at church, in the store, or at other activities. Thus it is nice to hear that our kids are pleasant to be around and that they are positive influences in their classes.

Janelle and I have been fortunate to have good kids. They are certainly wonderful people. I look forward to seeing how their futures develop.

Pumpkin Carving

10/24/2017

Today's Cub Scout meeting was a Halloween party. There were a number of games that the boys could play, most of which had candy as prizes. Meanwhile, there was an area set up for pumpkin carving; we just had supply our own pumpkins and carving sets.

The carving sets came with preset patterns and a marker to draw them on the pumpkin. I made the mistake of pointing out to Rowen that one of the patterns looked like the Ghost Rider (who has been in the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. episodes that we've been watching lately). It happened to be one of the most complex patterns. Unfortunately, our pumpkins were so cold that not only were they slightly frozen inside, but water kept condensing on them, making the marker useless. Thus, I held the paper on the pumpkin with one hand (the condensation did help it stick in place), while I carved it out with the other. Rowen enjoyed being in charge of cutting out the top and scooping up all of the innards.

Connor spent most of his time playing the games and didn't start his carving until it was nearly time to clean up. This time, the roles reversed; he worked on the face while I scooped out the innards. Unfortunately, his pumpkin is currently unfinished as we ran out of time. So far its face is comprised of one triangle eye and a small mouth with pointy teeth at the bottom.

The boys said that the had a lot of fun and are glad that they joined Scouts. Me? I was just asked to be one of the Den Leaders ...

Ranger

10/23/2017

Ranger died today while I was at school. I dug most of his grave under a break in the clouds with the help of the little boys near the top of our sledding hill in our yard. I finished the rest with snow slowly falling around me after picking up Trevor from his rehearsal. He helped me lay Ranger into and cover him in his final bed.

My nerves are raw. My grief has the intensity of the sun. I cannot look directly at it for fear of getting burned. Instead, I take brief glances into it, looking at its edge, waiting for it to dull, knowing that it will in time. I wonder at myself. I know of others who are dealing with much greater grief than mine, but that does not stop me from sobbing at unexpected moments due to the loss of our pet.

Ranger was the friendliest cat I have known. We named him Ranger (short for the Lone Ranger) due to the "mask" across his face (although Zorro was also on the short list), but he lived up to his name with his adventuresome nature. He was perfect for our family, enduring our children growing up around him for over seventeen years. He would greet visitors at the door with demands of being petted, and claimed all laps as part of his kingdom (especially if he knew the person was allergic). At our last house, he would sit along the top of the couch and bat at people's heads until they served him with pets. He particularly liked getting rubbed on and around his ears, and would express his pleasure with a motorboat engine purr.

As a kitten, he was much more skittish, although still affectionate. He allowed Domino, his littermate (whom he survived by over three and a half years), to dominate the majority of their relationship, but he could give as well as he got in their epic battles. He was a daredevil who, in our home in Burr Oak, would continually jump across the top of the open stairway, sometimes unsuccessfully. Each failed attempt would see him walk drunkenly for a little while, but then he would go at it again.

We knew he was approaching his end. He had been acting his age for a while, but in the past week, he couldn't even jump up onto our bed--one of his favorite resting spots. Just the other day, I lifted him into my lap after he made an abortive attempt to jump into it. While he responded with his diminished purr as I rubbed his ears, I couldn't help but think that it would be one of the last times I would do so.

My sons are taking this better than me, but I realize that I knew Ranger longer than I know any of them. Even for all the times he caused messes, stole food, or was otherwise an annoyance, I would prefer to still have him living. My comfort is in knowing that whatever pain he was dealing with has come to an end.

Rest in peace, Ranger. You are missed.

The Twenty-ninth Sunday in Ordinary Time

10/22/2017

"Give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar." The Jews expected a Messiah who would lead them up in a rebellion against their oppressors, but Jesus is not that kind of Messiah. His revolution is a revolution of our hearts and souls. He did not come to lead at the head of an army, dealing out violent death to all who oppose Him. Rather, He offers everyone love and life.

Today's homily noted how quickly the Roman coin was produced after Jesus asked for it. The Pharisees are caught in their hypocrisy with such swiftness as they were obviously carrying the coin which they so despised. So too is it with many vocal Christian politicians today. They shout for Christian values while their souls are laden with the wealth of this world.

I, too, am tied too tightly to this world and its trappings. Yet, as Tevye says in The Fiddler on the Roof, after someone tells him that money is the world's curse: "May the Lord smite me with it. And may I never recover."

... Now I'm worried that a bank vault is going to fall on me ...

Snow!

10/21/2017

I know that for many people "snow" is yet another four letter word, but for me it brings a great deal of joy and contentment. Thus, I was in a particularly good mood this morning when I saw a light dusting covering the ground, almost like a powdered sugar over a funnel cake. I was even more excited later in the day to actually watch the snow fall for a little while. They were tiny flakes, small and dry, but still fun to watch.

I'm hoping for a good snowfall this year--enough to keep the skiers and snowmachiners happy. I'm hoping that the boys will build forts and get plenty of chances to test out our sledding run now that the brush and fallen tree have been removed. I also look forward to watching our dogs play tag, weaving and dodging through the drifts.

I have yet to get a plow of any kind for the driveway. While I actually enjoy shoveling in the sense that it gives me a reason to "play" with the snow and to be outside, considering the difficulty that my back is currently giving me, I would prefer to have that time on the back of a quad.

... hopefully, next year.

Fetch

10/20/2017

Starbuck's fascination with fetching has only increased over time. She has three rubber balls that she alternates between. When no one is willing to throw the ball for her, she will try throwing them herself. Occasionally, this means dropping one from the top of the stairs and trying to catch it before it hits the bottom. More often, this means placing the ball next to some low, flat space (like the bottom of an end table) and then jumping on it. If she hits it right, the ball shoots out from under her paw and then bounces off the flat surface in an unexpected direction (unfortunately, that direction is often under the item in question).

These balls end up in odd spots. She seems to delight in trying to get them out of them. We've caught her deliberately dropping them from the edge of the stairs so they will fall behind her kennel. She has figured out how to paw at them through the bars to get them to pop back out again. However, if a ball ever does get stuck beyond her ability to get, she then whines until someone gets it for her--even if another ball is right next to her.

Her favorite activity is for someone to throw for her. The best is when outside, but she also likes it when the ball is throw up or down the stairs. She particularly likes bank shots as well as high tosses that give her a chance of catching the ball--either on the initial throw or on a bounce.

She has become a bit demanding about playing, often dropping the ball on our feet or in our laps over and over again until we throw it. Unfortunately, she really enjoys chewing the balls until they are covered in slobber before she drops them. Playing fetch with her often ends with slimy hands.

Still slimy hands are a small price for giving her such joy.

End of the 1st Quarter 2017

10/19/2017

As I am a sap who accepts student work until the final day of the quarter, I was flooded with student work that I need to grade. As the end of the quarter also brought an end to all of my lesson plans so far this year, I also have to work on what my classes are going to do on Monday (the students do not have school tomorrow, but teachers are still reporting for a professional development day). Considering that there were no meetings or practices that I had to drive the boys to today, and that I just quit playing the game that has been eating most of my time lately, one would think I put a dent in this workload today.

Instead I finished the second of Stephen King's books in the Dark Tower Series: The Drawing of the Three.

I could blame this lapse on the fact that I needed a break after the hectic pace that made up my day (e.g. At one point after school I realized that I was simultaneously handing one student a test he missed, giving another student the words for a vocabulary quiz she missed, receiving two different students' last minute projects, checking another student's current point total, and listening to Trevor tell me when his day's rehearsal was over--which he would get wrong. This went on for a while with some of the people and demands changing. The last student from the maelstrom to leave had a wide-eyed look and stated disbelief at the tasks I had juggled). I could blame it on my back. While I am getting better, sitting on the couches that I brought up from Michigan last year (which is currently my favorite place to get grading done) currently cannot be done without a throbbing discomfort that includes a reward of sharp pains for trying to get back up from sitting.

However, the truth is that I got hooked on the book (I was halfway through when I started today) and needed to know how Rowland was going to deal with the Odette / Dette problem. I did not foresee that the answer would be Susannah.

... and my distrust of lobsters has only heightened.

Quitting Overwatch

10/18/2017

I have to pull the plug on this video game. Like an addict, I've tried to wean myself from the game, only to go on a binge and then fully addicting myself again. I have spent more hours than I would like to admit playing it, and many of them have not been happy.

I hit my breaking point yesterday for a variety of reasons. 1) I become a monster when losing, and I have been on a massive losing streak. I snap at my family and hold the anger built from the game long after I turn it off. I really don't like that side of me.

2) The game has not been as rewarding to play. They give players a rating based on their wins and losses. However, they changed the formula this season so that, somehow, I have more wins than losses, but my score is a hundred and seventy points below where I started the season. As I am a complete geek, I keep tabs on all of my stats for each game, and I have been receiving medals (usually gold) in every one. I even take on the positions (as it is a team game) that the other players aren't willing to play. Yet, the game seemed to be punishing me for that choice.

3) I have to hog the Internet to play. Our bandwidth is good for our area, but limited for this sort of play. Even automated updates for other computers can slow down my game, raising my anger and frustration, which often leads to yelling.

4) It has been eating my time. I think that I can just get on and play one quick game only to find that hours have passed by the time I log off. This has cut into my sleep time and has also probably had me sitting in this chair too often for no productive purpose.

I like the game ... too much. It is hard, very hard to let it go. But I think I must.