Blog Archives - The Land of the Weird

The Land of the Weird

Our House

3/31/2017

It was a year ago, today, that we finally got the keys to our house. It's hard for me to fully establish an anniversary for this momentous event. We signed the papers on the 30th, got the keys on the 31st, spent a few days fixing up things, our primary move and first night was on April 1st, we weren't completely moved out of the rental until April 7th, and we didn't truly have our house set up as it currently is until July (and there are still some boxes that we need to go through). Basically, I feel like celebrating for at least a week.

We do still have occasional surprises. When we moved into the house last year, most of the snow was already gone. This year, we still have several feet of snow, including piles taller than I am. Today, the compacted snow on our garage finally slid off in almost two massive chunks--one for each side (our cabin has the steepest roof and has been largely snow free for a while, and our house has lost about 3/4s of its snow).

I heard the thump when it happened, but it was Connor who explained what the sound was and why Starbuck was going crazy. I quickly looked out in the hopes of catching the tail end of the fall, only to notice that River, who was on her chain outside, was freaking out from the experience. Connor untangled her from the trees and she bolted into the house. Rowen and Conner then took the opportunity to hike the newly formed "mountains" in our yard.

The snow from the garage roof buried a good portion of the cabin--which sits next to it. I didn't realize this until Janelle told me after she returned from work a couple hours later. I then immediately got out there and unburied the cabin's exhaust for its heater (which had thankfully gone into its automatic shutdown). I had to dig down several feet to reach the exhaust which is several feet above the ground. The mountain of snow was actually compact enough to support even my weight.

I just hope that our house does not reveal any unexpected drainage issues when all of this melts. That would be a rotten way to spend an anniversary.

Sleeping with the Fishes

3/30/2017

Connor is away on an overnight field trip at the Seward Marine Life Center. Due to Alex and Janelle's work schedules, our car situation, my work, and Trevor and Rowen's bus schedules, it did not work out for me to accompany him. At some point, I would really like to go, and this trip sounds like it will be a great deal of fun. Sure, I would have to swallow fears born from a couple of TV shows that showed overnight aquarium field trips going bad, and would have to adjust to sleeping on something less comfortable than my bed, but I think the benefits outweigh the negatives.

Despite my concerns that Rowen would have problems going to sleep without his brother, he seems to be doing fine. He did, unfortunately, forget his backpack (something that Connor helps remind him to bring) either on the bus or at school. Hopefully, that will be the extent of his difficulties without his big brother to watch over him.

I'm sure that Connor is having a good time. I hope he takes plenty of pictures as he was really excited about getting to bring our digital camera (and plenty of batteries for that power-chewing monster). I hope he gets some sleep too.

Dona Nobis Pachem

3/29/2017

I feel like I'm barely keeping it together this week. I have personally acknowledged just how rotten I've been feeling about current events in my life, but I am also trying my best to not let my feelings create a wake of negativity from my interactions with others. It's okay for me to be depressed about depressing things. In fact, I would argue that being happy about depressing things would be the mark of a sociopath. Still, acknowledging that depression is one thing, wallowing in it is another.

Yet I've been struggling to get out of bed lately and spending large amounts of my rather limited time staring off into space as though I could construct a better future through sheer force of will. The increasing requirements of the two courses that I am taking feel like hoops more than learning opportunities (but, then, I felt that about many courses I've taken for my other degrees as well). Add to that the sadness I've felt for every time a student has asked me if I am going to coach hurdles this year and ... well, there I go wallowing.

I had the kids at Faith Formation singing Dona Nobis Pachem in preparation for the Sunday after Easter. The phrase is Latin for "grant us peace." I think of River in the movie Serenity praying, "Please God, make me [like] a stone" when she's battling all of the mental images that tear at her sanity. I do not wish to feel nothing, but rather to feel wrapped in the peaceful assurance that this is all following God's plan. Dona Nobis Pachem.

Head Transplant

3/28/2017

I also thought of titling this one "Sisterly Love." After the puppies ate the body of Rowen's favorite stuffed animal, Woof Woof (pronounced "Roof Roof" by Rowen), I had been for disposing of the mangled head as well. Alex, however, insisted that we let him keep the head.

On Sunday, she purchased a stuffed animal with the same approximate body shape and size that Woof Woof had been. Today, she asked Rowen to borrow Woof Woof's head, telling him that she found him a body. I recently read that someone was about to perform the world's first head transplant. It turns out that Alex beat them to the punch. As a finishing touch, she also replaced Woof Woof's missing nose. Rowen picked out a pink one (his favorite color) to replace the one that the puppies ate.

There's a little bit of a fur difference, but the change actually makes Woof Woof quite a bit softer, something that Rowen has commented on many times. He's very happy with the end result and has told me several times how much he loves his big sister. He's sleeping with the newly restored Woof Woof at this moment.

Like most transplants, I am relieved for the recipient, but cannot help but feel saddened for the loss of the donor (although obviously to a lesser degree than for actual living people). Still, the unnamed stuffed animal is a sort of hero. It lost its body so Woof Woof could go on, and a little boy could have his friend back.

Aurora Viewing

3/27/2017

I was in rather low spirits when I awoke this morning. The weekend seemed to pass by entirely too quickly and was more draining than reenergizing (primarily thanks to the amount of time I spent on my coursework). I sometimes find myself cycling through dark thoughts as though I get some sort of pleasure from doing so even as the process only reinforces the darkness forming in my mind. Such was my pattern when I looked up at the sky while letting Starbuck back inside the house.

A ribbon of light danced its way across the early morning. Flashes of pinks and bluish-purples expanded and disappeared as the misty gown of green flowed, folded, and swirled from one horizon to the other. It seemed more like watching angels dance than watching an electrochemical reaction in the heavens.

I woke Janelle and pulled Alex and Trevor out to watch as well. This was, by far, the best showing of the Aurora Borealis since we moved to Soldotna, let alone to our current house. I tried finding better vantage points from different windows in our house, but nothing compared to the unobscured view from our cold driveway.

By the time Trevor and I left for school, the lights were still dancing, but were much harder to see as the morning light of the sun was starting to fill the sky. Sure, my problems didn't disappear with the coming of the lights. They just seemed so much lighter and easier to bear.

The Fourth Sunday in Lent

3/26/2017

We have a new priest at our church. Hopefully, this will make the jobs of our other priests, who are also shared between several churches in several towns, much easier. I cannot help but be concerned that all of them are past the point where I would want to retire. Father Rodger, our pastor, just had his 80th birthday this past week. Our new priest, Father Ron, said he is 74. While our church community might be fine for now, that might not be the case in just a few years.

I certainly appreciated Father Ron's sense of humor. I think that my father would also appreciate that the mass stayed under the hour mark. As for the sermon, what really stuck with me was Father Ron's story about what his grandmother said when he first visited her after becoming a priest. It was something like "Don't let it go to your head, for it will come out of your mouth and you will be thought a fool. Rather, let it go your heart, for it will come out of your hands and you will be thought a helper."

We also had plenty of children join in for today's children's choir. They sang out enthusiastically on all of the refrains and could even be heard during some of the verses. I was impressed.

Easily Influenced

3/25/2017

I find myself quite susceptible to the opinions of others. This is particular true in the case of movies, TV shows, and other forms of entertainment. I remember forcing myself to like certain rock groups (particularly Yes) when in high school because of how much some of my friends enjoyed it. To the same degree, I found my enthusiasm for Michael W. Smith diminish when one of my friends belittled some of his songs. Another example is the movie Daredevil (with Ben Affleck). I actually enjoyed watching the director's cut of the movie (the theatrical version deserved much of the bile it received), but I hesitate in saying so because 1. most people don't care and 2. those who do care usually vilify Ben Affleck's portrayal of any superhero (I had no problem with him as Batman in the latest movie; I just had a problem with Batman).

Case in point: I have been looking forward to the Iron Fist series on Netflix since it was first hinted at before the first season of Daredevil (not to be confused with the above-mentioned movie) was released. As we came closer to its release date (a week ago, last Friday), my anticipation only grew. However, then the reviews started coming in--and almost none of them were positive. Suddenly a show that I had considered binge-watching without Janelle (called TV cheating) now holds almost no interest for me--and I haven't even seen an episode.

I wonder why I am so easily swayed. It doesn't seem to come from my parents. My father almost works in the opposite (e.g. tell him you don't like the Lone Ranger movie by Disney and he'll end up loving it). Meanwhile we still haven't been able to convince my mother to watch even one of the Harry Potter movies. Perhaps it's part of my ingrained desire to be liked--loved even--and to fit in. Still, it does depend on who's talking. I have yet to have someone convince me to like Jar Jar Binks.

Excerpt

3/24/2017

Hearing the dragon's prophesy sparked something deep within his chest; the heroic calling which he had so long avoided now burst into a song that filled his mind and straightened his spine. Before Angus or Adrienna could stop him, Quint strode confidently to sword. The eyes of the four statues that held the mighty blade seemed to follow his path as he reached out and grabbed the hilt. He flexed his fingers and then curled them around the twin dragons that entwined to form the grip of the Champion's Blade. He settled his fingers, feeling the scales on the intricately carved dragons that somehow felt warm in his hand, almost as though stout living beings were breathing in his grasp. Looking at the dragon who had again taken on the form of a human priest, Quint tightened his grip, and began to pull the sword loose from the statues' grasp.

Nothing happened. The sword did not move.

Although in his heart he knew it was useless, Quint strained against the stone. The handle no longer felt warm, but cold and hard, quickly growing slick from his sweating palm. He reached up with his other hand and grabbed the hilt with both hands, pulling with all his might.

Again, nothing.

A chest-deep chuckle emanated from the dragon priest. Angus placed a friendly hand on Quint's shoulder and clicked his tongue in mock exasperation. "I wouldn't worry about it. I'm sure lots of guys have that problem." He then patted Quint on the shoulder, stepped to the side, interlaced his fingers and stretched out his arm, producing a few cracks from his knuckles and back.

Making shooing gestures with his hands, Angus said "Why don't you step aside, and let me show you how it's done?"

Quint gave a silent scoff and released the sword with a quiet smile, stepping back to where Adrienna was watching and giving his friend an open path. The singer sauntered up to the blade in what was clearly a mockery of Quint's earlier trek, placed his pinkie and thumb around the hilt with his other three fingers purposefully stretched away, made a small tug, shook his head, and stepped back from the sword.

"Nope. I'm obviously not champion material," Angus gave an exaggerated wink to his friends, and lifted out his hand to Adrienne. "Maybe Adrienne is the one. Do you want to give it a try?"

Adrienne, whose hands had stayed clasped behind her back since the dragon first found her investigating his horde, shook her head, "I think I'll pass this time."

The red-robed priest chuckled again. "I said that your presence here was foretold and that the Champion would claim the Champion's Blade, not that any of you were the Champion."

Tighter Jeans

3/23/2017

Last year, I was making great progress on my overall health by improving my exercise and diet. My weight was lower than it had been since my days in college, and I had not only moved down one waist size, but I was thinking that at least one more size down would be in order soon. Unfortunately, I plateaued. My weight then made a predictable jump during the holidays only to settle again at the earlier plateau.

Irritatingly, the size down in jeans that had been roomy before feel quite a bit less comfortable since their last wash. My weight has actually edged down in the past couple of weeks (which is a surprise to me), but my jeans are arguing otherwise. This is particularly aggravating as I do not have many jeans which like wearing, the only other decent pair being a size higher and still feeling too loose.

At least my blood sugar has been down this week.

The Demise of Little Woof Woof

3/22/2017

Little Woof Woof (not to be confused with Woof Woof) was a tiny stuffed animal that Rowen has slept with for years. Since we got our puppies, he has been carrying Little Woof Woof around with him whenever he fed the dogs. More than once, I have discovered the stuffed animal with its head in the dog bowl. On one occasion, Rowen even chastised me for picking the stuffed dog up because he wasn't finished eating yet. I have warned him that the puppies don't see Little Woof Woof as a fellow dog, but more like a chew toy, and that Rowen needed to keep all of his stuffed animals in his room.

Today, Rowen left Little Woof Woof on the couch (after being told to put him away) when we left for Faith Formation (their Wednesday evening religion class). Before heading home, I received a text from Alex telling me that the puppies had eaten Little Woof Woof. I forewarned Rowen, so he and Connor immediately searched for what might be left of the stuffed dog when we got home. Sadly, all that was recovered was Little Woof Woof's head with its nose missing.

Rowen was quite upset, but said that at least he still had the head to sleep with. True to his word, he went to sleep cuddling the slightly mangled stuffed dog head. I'm not certain how creeped out I am by that.

Antics

3/21/2017

Today, upon arriving home from school, both of the younger boys asked to take out their bikes in an attempt to ride them on our mostly-iced-over driveway. They weren't as successful as they would have liked, but more successful than I thought they would be. Successful or not, they looked like they were having fun, both insisting on wearing their bike helmets "just in case."

Meanwhile, our eldest cat has started messing with my mind. We have a bell by the door for the puppies to ring when they want to go out (which can be quite often if they are overly excited). The other day, Ranger (our cat) was meowing by the door like he wanted to go out. I gave him a few pets, but it obviously wasn't enough as I heard the bell ring almost immediately after I turned my back. When I looked to see which dog to yell at (they had both been just let out and back in), I saw Ranger batting at the ball-like bell and then look at me meaningfully. I almost let him out just to see his reaction, but I figured it would have been like the last time where he puffed up and tore back into the house the moment he could.

Lastly, I am certain that the people at the boys' bus stop have labeled me as "that idiot in the Prius" since I once again got a bit stuck on the side of the road. Thankfully, since everyone just left me to my own devices this time, I was able to coax Mera up the hill after a number of failed attempts. I just can't win. The only place to park where I'm sure not to get stuck, I got stuck anyway when I misjudged where the edge of the road was (and then got yelled at for being too close to the communal mailboxes despite being more than a car-length away). One way or the other, I'm "that guy."

Vernal Equinox 2017

3/20/2017

We made it! Light now outlasts the darkness. From now until September, everyone south of us has less total daylight than we do. Although it's still cold with plenty of snow outside, it's nice to have the sun on this side of the Equator.

Although winter is my favorite season, I have a soft spot for spring as well. Personally, I'm looking forward to breaking out the Hawaiian shirts and cargo shorts in the near future. I already wore a Hawaiian shirt on the day before spring break as a way to celebrate the beginning of that vacation (which was not technically in spring and was over all too soon).

May the increasing light help energize us all!

The Third Sunday of Lent

3/19/2017

While I know that today's readings all focus on the idea of thirst and the impossibility of the world to satisfy over the long term, the main thing I seemed to focus on during today's readings was just how sassy that Samaritan woman seemed to be. I don't know why, but I always seem to hear her voice in a New Jersey accent. I'm paraphrasing here: "If YOU'RE going to provide me with living water, where's your bucket?" and "Sure, I'd like your everlasting water; that way I don't have to keep climbing up this hill" and "So, you think you're better than Jacob, our ancestor, do you?" I believe that the actual conversation was probably even more earthy than that.

I like to think that Jesus was amused by this woman. He sees something within her that is worth saving, even though He was not supposed to mix with her kind of people. He is patient in His explanations and accepts the town's hospitality. I cannot help but notice how different His reception was at this Samaritan village than it was in His home town.

Jesus often seems to take on disciples who have a bit of an edge to them. Perhaps He appreciates the wit behind some of their sarcasm. Actually, I'm kind of hoping He does.

Fear Is the Mind-Killer

3/18/2017

I watched the first half of the 1984 movie Dune with Trevor today. (Amazingly, I got through the scene with the hand in the box without cringing.) I was reminded of how many quotes from this movie still rattle around in my head ("They tried and failed?" "No. They tried and died."). It's the quotes about fear that seemed powerful to me as I watched the movie today. In fact, I think today was the first time that I recognized that the Emperor of the Universe's actions were based almost entirely on fear (the Harkonnens obviously thrive on fear), thus setting him even farther apart from the Atreides.

Fear truly is the mind-killer. We know from brain research that people quite simply do not have access to higher-order brain functions when in fight-flight-freeze mode. Our body devotes all of its power to simple survival. While fear might motivate someone to physically act and to teach behavioral obedience, it puts up barriers for critical thought.

Perhaps this is why we see so much fear in politics and the media. What better way is there to keep people from seeing the magician-style illusions that go on in or world? While our brains focus on the fear that has been placed before us, we miss the chance to fully reflect and evaluate the actual state of our world and our lives.