Whether it's day or night, whether it's rainy or sunny, please turn your lights when you drive.  Statistically speaking, people who drive with their lights on are 40% less likely to get into an accident.  Now, I don't know if that is a causal or a correlative relationship.  Perhaps those people conscientious enough to drive with their lights on just tend to be better drivers.  But I think that's only part of it.  Having cars with their lights on are more visible to drivers of other cars, no matter the time of day.

Alaska requires that all vehicles travelling more than 45 miles per hour must have their lights on.  Most states require that lights be on at least a half hour before sunset and a half hour after sunrise as well as during any precipitation.  Yet today, while driving through snowy weather that occasionally turned to white-out conditions, I saw numerous cars travelling without their lights on.

It isn't about what you can see; it's about other people seeing you.  Even on clear days it can be difficult to see other vehicles on the road if their lights aren't on (I find this particularly true with grey vehicles that seem to just blend in with the road).  Many newer cars, such as my Prius, are now equipped with daytime running lights specifically for the purpose of making accidents less likely.

It is one more thing to remember after starting the car (and I even forget from time to time), but it's a simple step that makes one of the most hazardous tasks that we do on a regular basis just a little bit safer.  Drive with your lights on.  The life you save might be your own.

Lent is coming early this year.  This coming Wednesday is Ash Wednesday.  Already, I need to start thinking about what I am going to do extra or give up.

I've formed some good habits due to past Lents.  Among them include, saying a Chaplet of Divine Mercy on my way home from work (or a Rosary on longer drives), reading from a religious text (it started with the Bible, but has expanded) every day, writing a blog post every day, and praying at meals with the family.

Others that I have tried include giving up all video games (which was a disaster), giving up single player video game (also did not work out well), writing at least one story or chapter a week (worked well, but at the expense of other work that I needed to do), and no snacking after 9PM (I didn't hold to that one that well).

The point is to find something that either detracts from our connection with God and remove it, give up something we like as a reminder of God's sacrifice to us, or find something that we want to improve and add it.  It should be something that helps us focus more on God, but it shouldn't be something that builds our resentment to this process.  It should not be something that is necessary to our health and well-being, but it should also not be something so trivial that it doesn't matter.

I still have a few days to think on this one.  I'm just not sure.

Tomorrow is the start of a four day weekend for me.  Currently, I don't have much in the way of plans for ow I'm going to spend my time.  Obviously, I plan to sleep in at least a little bit, and Skyrim isn't going to play itself, but other than that ...

Usually, I have some kind of plan when it comes to my time off, even if it is a plan to just play video games.  This weekend, well, I'm just not sure.  I know that it includes Valentine's Day on Saturday, and that I will be singing the psalm in church on Sunday.  

Here are some things that I would like to accomplish:
I haven't made any progress on the past three writing projects that I have started.  I would like to get at least a scene out of one of them.
I would like to play a couple of hours of Borderlands with my daughter.
I would like to plan at least one adventure to DM.
I would like to watch at least one movie (not just TV shows).
I would like to go out on a date (perhaps a double-date) with my wife.
I would like to send for our tax rebate.
And Skyrim.

... It's like a set of resolutions for a weekend.  While all would be nice, I think four out of seven (one for each day) could be considered a win.

Janelle and I are following an online marriage retreat for this week.  Today being day four, it asks us to write a note about our deepening love for one another.  I am facing the worst writer's block on this.  Janelle and I have been married for over twenty years.  I've spent more than half of my life with her, and I wouldn't change that for anything, but expressing that is not such an easy thing.  It's especially difficult to write it sincerely without it sounding, well, shmoopy.  Here I go anyway:

Dear Janelle,

We were basically just kids when we met.  We stepped into a lifelong commitment without any real idea about what that meant.  Somehow, in a time when so many people fall from one bad decision into another, we managed to make the best decision of them all.  While some might call it fate, or luck, or destiny, I know that it was God who knew what an amazing team that we would make.  He knew how much we would grow in love for one another and how much we would need each other.

Our path together has not always been easy.  There have been times that, although we loved one another, we didn't want to be anywhere near each other.  There were times where we pushed each other away, although often it was with the silent prayer that doing so would prove how much the other really loved us.  

I fully realize that I am incomplete without you.  On the few occasions that we have been separated due to work or circumstance, I have felt empty and terribly alone.  I worry when you are away and am restless until you return.  

I have become so accustomed to you, that I unfortunately have taken you for granted from time to time.  But that has never been due to a lack of love.  You and I are one.  You are a part of my very being.  Like two trees that have intertwined, the years have only brought us closer together, nourishing one another.

May our love only continue to grow.

Your devoted husband,
Paul

There are any number of problems that plague public schools.  Yet there is one relatively straightforward fix that would go a long way in making schools better: drywall.

My favorite rooms to teach in have had drywall.  The cinderblock construction of most classrooms gives them an institutional (in the worst connotation of the word) sort of feel.  They lack warmth.  They signify a lack of trust and care.  A lack of trust in the sense that cinder blocks are more difficult to damage than drywall suggesting the students would damage anything less resilient.  A lack of care in the sense that the people who constructed the building do not care enough to pay to add that extra amount which would make the place look nicer.

As a teacher, I would like walls that I don't need industrial-grade adhesive to put up posters or decoration.  I would like walls that have some amount of insulation to keep out the noise from adjoining classrooms.  And I would like walls that add a level of beauty to my students' daily lives.

This is not the solution to all of the problems that modern public schools face, but it's something that would make more of a difference than people might first think.  People behave, react, and think better in beautiful surroundings.  Drywall might not by itself make our schools beautiful, but it's certainly a step up from the cinder-block cells that our students usually see every day.

The PowerBall jackpot is nearly half a billion dollars (that's billion with a "b").  As is frequent when a jackpot gets this big, I can't help but think of the many ways that I could use that amount of money, how it could change many aspects of my life for the better.  The truth is, most people don't do so well after winning the lottery, even with large amounts.  The money does not buy them the happiness that they seek and can often lead them to depression and ruin.

It makes relatives you never knew come out of the woodwork.  Suddenly, everyone believes that you owe them something or that you can fix all of their problems.

It brings crooks and fears of crooks into your life.  You become a target for get-rich(er)-quick scam artists and even more hardened criminals.  You start to get concerned about the safety of your family as they are now legitimate kidnapping targets.  Worse are the legal criminals: banks and investors who will try to convince you of "sure-thing" investments.

You will want to get a lawyer and an accountant, but how do you know that you can trust them?  How many stories are out there of people getting swindled by someone who takes all of their money overseas (and often the spouse as well)?

Which leads to the most difficult issue, you stop trusting people as much.  Who is only your friend (or your children's friends) because of your wealth?  Can you trust your family and friends as you did before?

A prize of that size makes you switch from struggling to get money to being afraid to lose it.  It brings a number of issues that most people wouldn't think of to your door.  That said, I can't help but agree with Tevye from "Fiddler on the Roof" when he's told that money is a curse:  "Then may God smite me with it.  And may I never recover."

Today's first reading is one of human suffering and hardship.  It's from the Book of Job, which is almost completely devoted to those ideas.  Today's reading even ends with the line: "I shall not see happiness again."  I have difficulty saying "Thanks be to God" after readings like this one.  

I don't know why the Church chose to pull this excerpt from Job as the book's overall message is actually quite positive.  Job suffers and suffers terribly, but through it all he remains true to God.  He does not believe that God is punishing him, and he is right.  The book also shows that difficult times and tragedies occur to anyone, that bad things can happen to good people.  More people need to remember that fact.  Too often I hear people who "have" claim that the people who "have not" are in such a situation because of the "have not's" own choices.  They blame the terrible things that people go through on some fault of the people themselves.  The Book of Job shows us that is not God's way.

Meanwhile, the Gospel shows Jesus healing people, casting out demons, trying to get a moment to himself for prayer, and then beginning his ministry throughout Galilee.  Our pastor pointed out that Jesus did not heal everyone.  He did not solve everyone's problems. Instead, He modeled actions that we should all learn from.  He showed compassion, not judgement.  He brought healing, not condemnation.  He preached salvation, not self-satisfaction.

He gives us healing when we ask, but the healing is not always physical, rather it is often spiritual in nature.  He wants us to come to Him out of love, not obligation nor desire for reward.

The air temperature has been above freezing for most of the day and it's supposed to rain tomorrow.  With over a foot of snow from last week sitting in our yard, today seemed like our best, if not last, chance to play in the snow this winter.  My four-year-old has been begging to build a snowman.  It was his request to do so today that sparked our afternoon adventure.

While Trevor had to be pried from his computer with a spatula, eventually all of my children who were home were outside.  Our first priority was the snowman.  Rowen was particularly committed to making certain that the snowman had sticks for arms.  On Connor's first foray to find arms, he came back with two logs rather than sticks, but he eventually got it right.  Nina insisted that the snowman have rocks for eyes and a nose, but I provided his snowy eyebrows.

Even before the snowman was completed, we started work on the snow fort.  Connor insisted that we had to have one as a barrier for a snowball fight.  This snow fort was not as wide or as tall as some of our previous winters' works, but I was still exhausted after getting what we did together.  Before we finished, a snowball fight (slow throws only) ensued.  I was doing well catching the snow balls thrown my way until Trevor and Nina timed their attacks to hit at the same time.  While I was busy batting away Trevor's second toss, Nina's snow ball managed to hit me in my chin.  Even though the fight continued for some time after that, that was the last solid hit on me.

Our hill is steep, but limited, and I decided that my parents' hills had gone unused for long enough.  We called ahead, piled in the van, and headed over.  Once there, we made some good sled runs on two of the hills.  I went down a couple of times with Rowen and then pulled him back up the hill on the sled.  When I suggested after one of the runs that it was his turn to pull me, he giggled and said, "You're too heavy."  At which point, I let go of the sled he was on and let him slide back down hill.  He thought that was great and had me do it again two more times (at which point, I was too tired to continue).  

Connor discovered my old snowboard (which I received on my 18th birthday) and managed to make it down the hill without falling after only three attempts.  After a couple more, he even started holding his hands behind his back as he went down, so confident had he become.  Meanwhile, Rowen was the first to give up and go to ask his grandma for snacks.

It was a great several hours.  I'm now sore and tired, but in the best sort of way.

In the past four days,, I have been in two near miss situations involving other vehicles.  On Wednesday night, a lady pulled out in front of me on an icy road.  Thankfully, I was already driving cautiously and I saw her start to make her move in time to stop.  Today, a van crossed the middle line and I nearly ended up in a drift on the side of the road.  Again, I was paying enough attention that I was able to slow enough and move far enough to the side for the van to correct and get back to his side of the road without hitting us.  My copilot believes that the driver was texting.  

In neither of those situations did I feel any kind of fear.  Instead, I felt detached, like an outside observer, rationally seeing the options and taking the appropriate actions.  

Yet when faced with situations that are much less deadly, such as when a student confronts me physically, I have difficultly acting rationally at all.  My throat clenches up, my chest tightens, a vein on my left temple begins to throb, and all I can think about is how angry and scared I am.  This doesn't mean that I don't act, or even speak, but that my actions and words come out without any thought behind them, often worsening a situation unless I can somehow bring my fear response under control.

This is a reason why I don't think I could survive in politics.  I see the pressure that politicians are put under and I know that some of my responses in those same situations would not have much, if any, thought behind them.  This is especially true for any argument that attacks my core values or beliefs.

Usually, it isn't for a number of minutes, if not hours, before my mind actually activates and processes what my best responses to these situations would be.  By then, however, it is too late.  Sometimes, if I'm lucky, my thoughtless responses were good enough for the situation.  Especially if it's a situation I've rehearsed in my mind, I can often come out fine without escalating the problem.

Unfortunately, interactions with people have more variables than interactions with vehicles.  There are more possibilities than I can possibly contemplate, let alone rehearse, and they aren't limited to a road with reverse almost never being an option.  Maybe that's why, even though the stakes aren't as high, the tension is.

My brother is planning a trip to Puerto Rico (passport issues, otherwise it would have been Costa Rica), my parents are planning a cruise down the Danube (Eastern Europe), my eldest daughter is planning to go to Lima, and my other daughter is going on a trip to Ireland, all this year.  This doesn't even take into account my sister who went to the Bahamas a month and a half ago (and is planning another trip later this year).  All of the above people have been out of country at least one other time (a few of them have done so many times).  I can't help but feel a bit envious.

Truthfully, not only do I not have the money to go on an international trip, I also don't have the money to enjoy being on a trip.  That said, there are a number of places that I would like to go:

Inland Passage from Washington to Alaska (only international for a little bit around Canada) - I spent time in Alaska's interior, I want to see its southern coast
Machu Picchu - And I need to do this one while I am still capable of climbing thousands of steps.
Teotihuacan - To see the Pyramid of the Sun from the Pyramid of the Moon, and vice versa. 
Mayan Ruins featured in the original Star Wars movie.
The Forbidden City - the real one, not the movie set.
The Great Wall - next to Beijing is fine
The Kremlin - maybe not at the moment
Anywhere in New Zealand where they shot scenes from The Lord of the Rings
The Highlands of Scotland - and the Loch
The Fjords - not just because that's fun to say
Poland - a visit to the motherland
Angkor Wat - If I can take the heat.
A cruise on nearly every major river.
Jerusalem 

I know that there are more that just aren't coming to mind at the moment.  It will be a while before I can do any of these.  And, you know, that's okay.  I've got Skyrim.

I didn't shave today.  I only noticed after I got to school and was rubbing my chin thoughtfully.  Somehow, I have managed to forget to shave now twice this week.  The first time was this Monday.  Since it was a snow day, by the time I noticed, it didn't really matter since I wasn't planning on going anywhere ... although my father did end up taking me to Outback for lunch, where I had my first "bloomin' onion" -- good stuff.  Today, I was in a bit of a rush since I knew that the roads were going to be bad (and they were) and I wanted to leave early (which I did) because I knew that it would be longer than normal to get to school (which it was).

In both cases, I had reasonable reasons for forgetting, but forgetting is exactly what I did.  It worries me, this forgetfulness.  I used to be able to rely on my memory to bring up nearly every small detail, but that power has faded considerably.  I've been told by some people that it's due to what we eat (which is certainly possible), the amount of radio waves passing through us (which there certainly are a lot), the plastic containers which hold my food (does anyone else think that they might multiplying on their own?), and even my antiperspirant (which I tried using rubbing alcohol and scented oils for a few months ... it didn't work).  Maybe it's a combination of all of them.

Forgetting to shave for a day isn't a big deal for me as hardly anyone notices.  It's the upshot of having a mustache and goatee (I can't call it a Van Dyke because I can't grow the whiskers to connect the two).  When I'm clean shaven, people ask me if I've shaved only a few hours after I have due to my dark, wiry whiskers.  Anyway, forgetting to shave isn't the end of the world.   I just don't like where this trend is headed.  For that matter, I can't help but wonder how many things that I've forgotten that I've forgotten.

I have enjoyed the blissful experience of a couple of snow days.  The winter storm that was warned on Saturday brought over 14 inches of snow to my home, effectively shutting us in.  We ended up shoveling Sunday morning, Sunday evening, Monday morning, and then twice again after the two times that the plows covered the end of our driveway.  I made certain to eat a bit and take some ibuprofen after each session.  Thankfully, previous years' back problems have done little more than twinge so far.

I have to say that I enjoy driving on snow as long as traffic is relatively light.  Sunday morning, I had the excuse that I was singing the psalms at church.  Janelle didn't want to drive, so I took the entire family in the van.  I stayed off of the roads after the storm started picking up in the afternoon, but I was on the road again before noon on Monday.  My father purchased a bar for his basement Saturday morning, but we didn't pick it up then or on Sunday due to the storm.  We tried to get it on Monday, but the store was closed.  It was lucky, then, that I also had today off as we were able to pick up the bar and finagle it into their basement (with some unfortunate scrapes).

Because of the large snowfall, the boys (and a couple of their friends) were able to sled and play in the massive snow piles that I had made by shoveling.  While I was too worn-out to join in, I certainly appreciated the impressive sight of the freshly-fallen snow.  Once the sun came out, the snow glistened like a blanket of stars on a sky of white.

I certainly love the snow, and I'm glad that this winter didn't pass us by without this heavenly blessing.  I know that the snow causes difficulty and danger for many people.  While I hope that it didn't inconvenience too many people and didn't bring anyone to harm, I am certainly glad that it came.

I have not seen some of the effects of several of the mods in this last collection.  For that matter, I still haven't even played through the Dragonborn or Hearthfire expansions.  That said, a few of these mods are (in my opinion) absolutely essential.  For some of them, it is required to download and run the game through the Skyrim Script Extender (SKSE).  One of the upshots of use Nexus Mod Manager (NMM) is that it gives an option of loading either Skyrim directly or through the SKSE which makes dealing with this a non-issue.

• Falskaar, Moonpath to Elsweyr (and seq file to fix dialogue), and Wyrmstooth - These three mods are the most heavily recommended unofficial expansions to the game.  I have thus far seen little more than an introductory conversation (which interrupted a main game conversation), but I've read great things about these three.  (I also downloaded, but have not initiated the Civil War Overhaul.  I had already restarted the game and didn't want to again.)
• Amazing Follower Tweaks - I haven't played around with this much as I tend not to use followers (I like playing a sneaky character, and they usually just get in the way).  That said, this mod is supposed to give amazing control over followers: their number, their gear, their actions, and their appearance.
• Diverse Guards Skyrim - I already love this mod as it makes it so the guards in and around Skyrim's cities and towns have a unique look.  I hadn't realized, until after adding this mod, just how bland (and sexist) the original groups of guards looked.  This mod adds a nice personality to the game.
• Unofficial Patches (Skyrim, Dawnguard, Dragonborn, and Hearthfire) - Skyrim is known for its occasional glitches and these are supposed to fix most of them.  I haven't noticed a difference so far, but I also haven't noticed any main game glitches either.
• SkyUI - This mod (which requires SKSE) is essential!  It completely overhauls Skyrim's cumbersome inventory, allowing the player to quickly sort and find items.  It takes a little bit to get used to (especially if you are still using a controller like I am), but it makes a world of difference.
• A Quality World Map - This is exactly what it sounds like.  It adds an extra level of visual detail to the original map as well as hand-painted roads.  It even gives the option of removing the cloud layer that used to obscure portions of the original map.
  

There are already some other mods which I am thinking about adding, but as is other people who have played Skyrim and have looked at my game have been impressed with the extra detail and improvements that have been made.  I already loved playing the game; these tweaks have made me appreciate it even more.

Today's Gospel tells of Jesus casting out a demon from a man who had been afflicted by the unclean spirit.  Our songs usually parallel the readings for any given mass, but one of today's really hit the mark.  "Silence! Frenzied, Unclean Spirit!" has been running through me head.  Ironically, its page number is even 666.

I believe that there are demons in our world that try to influence our thoughts and decisions.  To be clear, I don't believe that this makes us not responsible for our actions.  Also, I do not confuse the influence of these demons with legitimate mental illnesses.  That said, we are in the middle of a cosmic battle with our very souls at the center.

How do we fight something we can't identify with our senses?  The answer is simple and yet terribly difficult at once: live the best life that you can.  Jesus has already given us power to cast these demons out.  When tempted to do something contrary to what I know is right, or when I find my thoughts drifting into the realm of temptation, I can identify the culprit (usually Pride, Envy, Lust or Sloth) and cast them out.  Whether it was truly a demon or not, identifying the source of my inner conflict helps me to make the correct decision or at least point my thoughts in the right direction.