I have a love/hate relationship with Terry Goodkind's The Sword of Truth book series. One aspect of his books that continues to intrigue me are his "wizards' rules." Each book in the series presents a new rule, and while I don't agree with all of them (one of them even contradicts itself in the book that introduces it) there are several that certainly seem to hold true. Although my favorite of the rules is number eight (Deserve victory), the one that continually comes to mind is number four: "There is magic in sincere forgiveness; in the forgiveness you give, but more so in the forgiveness you receive."
I have already written about the importance of confession, so I won't belabor that particular point. Instead, I was reminded today of the power behind forgiveness, but not just any forgiveness; it has to be sincere. You see, today I used forgiveness as a weapon. I have done so before. When someone has wronged me, I have occasionally sought revenge by denying them the satisfaction of their revenge by openly forgiving them for their actions.
The thing is ... that's not sincere forgiveness. Such stumping the person might give me momentary pleasure, but unless I make the statement of forgiveness a sincere forgiveness within myself, I have cheapened both myself and the forgiveness itself. Obviously, since I used forgiveness as a weapon today, this is something that I still need to work on.
And I have been working on it today. I do not believe that I have fully forgiven this particular person, but I have at least made a stronger effort to understand the motivations behind the initial problem. While my attempt at forgiveness was rebuffed, I am glad that I took that route, even if it was initially as a weapon, rather than the angry responses that originally came to mind.
I was also today reminded several times about the "Golden Rule." I do not believe it is as important as forgiveness. I believe that forgiveness can be a nice side of "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," but a better rule to live by is the Great Commandment: Love your neighbor. Love means forgiveness, sincere forgiveness.
I have already written about the importance of confession, so I won't belabor that particular point. Instead, I was reminded today of the power behind forgiveness, but not just any forgiveness; it has to be sincere. You see, today I used forgiveness as a weapon. I have done so before. When someone has wronged me, I have occasionally sought revenge by denying them the satisfaction of their revenge by openly forgiving them for their actions.
The thing is ... that's not sincere forgiveness. Such stumping the person might give me momentary pleasure, but unless I make the statement of forgiveness a sincere forgiveness within myself, I have cheapened both myself and the forgiveness itself. Obviously, since I used forgiveness as a weapon today, this is something that I still need to work on.
And I have been working on it today. I do not believe that I have fully forgiven this particular person, but I have at least made a stronger effort to understand the motivations behind the initial problem. While my attempt at forgiveness was rebuffed, I am glad that I took that route, even if it was initially as a weapon, rather than the angry responses that originally came to mind.
I was also today reminded several times about the "Golden Rule." I do not believe it is as important as forgiveness. I believe that forgiveness can be a nice side of "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you," but a better rule to live by is the Great Commandment: Love your neighbor. Love means forgiveness, sincere forgiveness.
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